An Open Response to Every Vaguely Encouraging Blog Post I’ve Recently Read

I’m a big fan of feelings. I prefer the good ones, of course, but I can appreciate the value of a vast array. I want to feel them and talk about them and write about them and read about them and dance wildly because of them. I want to feel them so intensely that they make me cry and then I want to run to the mirror to see the result. It’s rarely attractive, I’ll tell ya that.
Here is every personality test I’ve ever taken in a nutshell: She loves people’s feelings but she sure can’t get anything done.
Whoops. Well, we all have our faults, right?

The Internet seems to have picked up on my love for feelings, (most likely due to all the online personality tests I take) because I tend to have a lot of feel-y blog posts pushed my way on this world wide web.
I should like them in theory, yes?

No.

Deep down I think I enjoy being difficult; but more importantly, with all the vague encouragement and go-get-em attitudes, I, the ultimate lover of feelings, am left rolling my eyes.

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Not a Tina Fey eye roll but dang close, am I right guys? You go, Mama Bluth.

Dear Writer of Vaguely Empowering Blog Posts,

I appreciate the heart behind your posts. I truly, truly do. The world needs more beauty and cheer and positivity like yours.

But.
You do not know me.

You say I’m beautiful.
You say I’m capable of amazing things.
You say that if I want to fill-in-the-blank, I should fill-in-the-blank.
You say such lovely, wonderful, empowering things about a person you know absolutely nothing about.
It leaves me feeling flat. Silly. Filled with fake fluorescent light instead of radiating sunlight.

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Thank you?

I receive love most significantly through words of affirmation. A simple, sincere compliment takes my heart and throws it up in the air like a dad with his baby. And like a dad with his baby (I certainly hope) a compliment catches my heart again and cradles and rocks it, making my heart feel ALL OF THE THINGS: joy, excitement, safety, contentment, etc. for no small amount of time.

A sincere compliment can do all of these things to me. It’s really great, actually.

I’m not asking these bloggers to stop writing encouraging posts. Lawd, no. The internet and the world at large, needs light and encouragement and beauty. I just want the light, encouragement, and beauty to be made up of the real stuff. Actual truth. Blazing sunlight.

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Maybe I shouldn’t have used the term “blazing sunlight” because this picture has it and I absolutely cannot take it seriously either. There is a good chance that I am simply hard to please. I’ll do some soul searching and report back with the answers.

So. If you’re wired like me and in need of a boost today, here are some real, genuine, truthful, blazing sunlight compliments:

You have a purpose. I don’t know if it’s big and grand and world changing. Maybe it’s small. But it’s definitely something. And it’s important. Keep looking for it.
 – You are unique. I don’t know how beautiful you are, or how talented you are, or how strong or creative or hard working you are. Maybe you are very dull and have horrible opinions. But I do know that God made only one of you exactly like you and He did it on purpose, so that’s something.
You are loved. Maybe not by a lot of people (I just want to cover my bases in case someone particularly awful is reading this; you never know) but definitely by God. If you don’t know Him yet, you can know that He loves you a lot anyway and is pursuing you intentionally right now. Like, right now. Currently. And if you do know Him, you should know His love for you is insane. Unfathomable. Fierce and sacrificial and full of genuine delight.

There are very few compliments one can give to general humanity. Maybe that’s the best part of humanity: our stories, environments, and genes are too vast and varied to give general fluff affirmations. It forces us to look harder, dig deeper, actually get to know the people around us in order to love and encourage them in honest ways.

And sometimes you look harder and dig deeper and realize you find a person absolutely insufferable but we won’t get into that. Positive vibes, people, positive vibes.

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One thought on “An Open Response to Every Vaguely Encouraging Blog Post I’ve Recently Read

  1. Emily Wooley says:

    Keep up the good words. I wish I had expressed myself when I was younger the way I do now. My Mom taught me I could do anything and encouraged me on a daily basis. My Dad was most special, too. I received many blessings and favor as a child and remembering them has helped me to become a person who expresses my feelings often. Even when to some people who think they are controversial. When God is leading, life keeps getting better even when things don’t seem to be going that well. Please keep being Emilie. You are special.

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